Being ridiculed for your weight is a very common thing in our society. Whether you are lean or fat, people will question your eating habits and lifestyle. I have always been that "big" girl through-out my life, at least for 29 years now.
I am at my heaviest now. And I did not gain this weight overnight just like Rome wasn't built overnight. I suffered a miscarriage in September 2015. I went into depression owing to unemployment and other insecurities. I began stress-eating. The only thing which gave me a sense of satisfaction and calm was food. JUNK FOOD. I also had hyperthyroidism. I did not realize that I was ruining my body completely. I felt petty and low. I was surrounded by so many negative people (I still do, I have learnt to ignore their existence now).
I was being ridiculed for my weight gain and all those stretch marks which had come over. Instead of giving me a solution, I was being made fun off. I was being called as ill. My pregnancy came as a surprise for many as according to them, obese women cannot get pregnant. (God help them).
I was not happy even then. Because of my weight, my pregnancy came with a lot of complications. It required care and attention. Long story short, I have learnt my lessons through my first pregnancy and ought not to repeat them in future.
After my daughter was born, I was adviced by many that I should take care of my health now and try to reduce all that weight I have gained. As a full-time mother, wife and daughter-in-law, I have a lot of responsibilities like many women out there. My daughter wakes up with me and sleeps when I do. I cannot afford to hit a gym because of my routine. Sometimes I cry my heart out when I try to fit in those skinny jeans and clothes which I once owned.
Despite all this, I have learnt not to hate myself. Unless I love myself dearly, how can I expect love from others? Self-love and self-confidence have always been my best friends. I have learnt to love my body and to worship it. When I realized that you become what you eat, I quit all those junk food cravings. But change comes slowly. Your child learns from what they see of you and I cannot let my daughter become what I became even if it was for some time.
I have always walked with my head held high. I have realized that my body is my strength and that I should worship it instead of ridiculing it. There are plenty of nerd asses out there to do so. My plus size has not changed my heart or soul. It has been the same ever since I was born. I can have a pure heart even in the size that I am (although I cannot wear those fashionable outfits which you wear and that makes me envious) (Human Nature babe). My clothes shall never define my character and also Beauty lies in the Eyes of the Beholder!
#Selflove.
I am at my heaviest now. And I did not gain this weight overnight just like Rome wasn't built overnight. I suffered a miscarriage in September 2015. I went into depression owing to unemployment and other insecurities. I began stress-eating. The only thing which gave me a sense of satisfaction and calm was food. JUNK FOOD. I also had hyperthyroidism. I did not realize that I was ruining my body completely. I felt petty and low. I was surrounded by so many negative people (I still do, I have learnt to ignore their existence now).
I was being ridiculed for my weight gain and all those stretch marks which had come over. Instead of giving me a solution, I was being made fun off. I was being called as ill. My pregnancy came as a surprise for many as according to them, obese women cannot get pregnant. (God help them).
I was not happy even then. Because of my weight, my pregnancy came with a lot of complications. It required care and attention. Long story short, I have learnt my lessons through my first pregnancy and ought not to repeat them in future.
After my daughter was born, I was adviced by many that I should take care of my health now and try to reduce all that weight I have gained. As a full-time mother, wife and daughter-in-law, I have a lot of responsibilities like many women out there. My daughter wakes up with me and sleeps when I do. I cannot afford to hit a gym because of my routine. Sometimes I cry my heart out when I try to fit in those skinny jeans and clothes which I once owned.
Despite all this, I have learnt not to hate myself. Unless I love myself dearly, how can I expect love from others? Self-love and self-confidence have always been my best friends. I have learnt to love my body and to worship it. When I realized that you become what you eat, I quit all those junk food cravings. But change comes slowly. Your child learns from what they see of you and I cannot let my daughter become what I became even if it was for some time.
I have always walked with my head held high. I have realized that my body is my strength and that I should worship it instead of ridiculing it. There are plenty of nerd asses out there to do so. My plus size has not changed my heart or soul. It has been the same ever since I was born. I can have a pure heart even in the size that I am (although I cannot wear those fashionable outfits which you wear and that makes me envious) (Human Nature babe). My clothes shall never define my character and also Beauty lies in the Eyes of the Beholder!
#Selflove.
It was a wow read 👍
ReplyDeleteThnak You Ashish!
DeleteHey nidhi was an awesome write... And u said truly clothes cannot decide character but poor thing is nobody thinks about ua inner beauty, and being plus or zero ua a mother and u will always be only most beautiful lady to ua daughter ��..
ReplyDeleteYes Veena. What you said is true. Thanks for your comment!
Delete